Evan Tsao

Albums

Here are some of the songs I've worked on. I'm always looking for new opportunities to learn and grow as an artist. If you have a project in mind, feel free to reach out. 🙂

  • Elderly School - An ode to the human condition

    Weekend at Bernie's inspired poster for the song Elderly School. Beats by CRITICAL BASS THEORY
    Welcome back
    Got a brand new track
    It’s your boy Evan T
    Better get up and clap

    I’m a middle aged man
    Retirement plan
    Got me workin like a jerk
    Cause life’s a pimp hand

    Got that savoir faire
    Salt and pepper hair
    Kickin dope rhymes
    In my favorite chair

    Yo the future looks bright
    When I walk into the light
    Reaper got me creepin
    Like a panther in the night

    Now my bucket list
    Is a fuck it list
    Fist full of pills
    Cause my symptoms persist

    I got pain in my lumbar six
    Mind always playin tricks
    Shed skin from psoriasis
    Wake up in the night to piss
    Time can eat a bag full of dicks

    Makin hay while the sun shines
    Gray fifty shades but aged like fine wine
    I’ll be keepin it real
    Until the last line
  • The One - A software engineer goes hard

    Matrix inspired poster for the song The One. Soundscape by CRITICAL BASS THEORY
    My mind is a gold mine
    My clock set to go time
    Hyperboles over these beats
    I got dope rhymes

    I try to be prolific
    A gift to the gifted
    Words so absurd
    Your world gets flipded

    I live that nerd life
    Balance that work life
    Droppin shit from on high while I fly
    Cause I’m bird-like

    Play by my own rules
    But live by a code
    Writing software. Writing rhymes
    Every line so bold

    Execution like a textbook
    Mouth like a check book
    Verses hard as cash
    Unexpected like a left hook

    Word to the word play
    Nerd is my surname
    Respect to the glasses
    Yes sir, I got nerd game

    Rhythm like an algorithm
    Code so clean
    Hack into the system
    The world is my machine
    Rockin this shit like the matrix, son!

    Break through the fakeness
    Evan T is The One
  • The Basics - A cultural subordination

    Truman Show inspired poster for the song The Basics. Beats by The Candle Man
    Not gonna lie, I’m a basic guy
    When I get a latte, It’s pumpkin spice
    You can try to judge me, I won’t live a lie
    Yes I’m a yuppie, I work 9 to 5

    Made this song on my Mac Book Pro
    Shop on amazon with my new iPhone
    Watch NBA on my Apple TV
    Wake up every day with an average physique

    Face it. I’m basic
    I claim it. Embrace it

    Haters gonna hate it, they can keep it real
    I prefer to fake it and that’s the deal
    Used to give a shit, now I don’t give a fuck
    If that ain’t legit, then I’m shit out of luck

    Got no game and I get no play
    Shop at the gap, wear slacks all day
    Watch what I say, and I stay in my lane
    Don’t want any trouble, I won’t complain

    Face it. It’s basic
    That’s how I play it

    Careful what you say if you wanna stay A-list
    Join every cause or they’ll call you a racist
    Cancel culture won, this is what replaced it
    Why make art, when the world wants hatred

    If you talk shit, I’ll change the subject
    Avoid conflict cuz I gotta say fuck it
    Now I gotta end it, Evan T on blast
    Someone got offended, getting shut down fast

    Face it. Stay basic
    Complacent is safest
  • Tiger Beat - Raw ambition meets a silky groove

    Crouching Tiger inspired poster for the song Tiger Beat. Sampling by Ox Dx
    I’m a hard act follow
    A hard pill to swallow
    Like the red one from the matrix
    I’m so real it’s hard to take this
    Back in effect with my brother Mike Z
    Got no respect for the powers that be

    Climb to the top of every single playlist
    Not gonna stop til I’m known as the greatest
    Recognize the game and the voice behind it
    I’m the people choice. Evan T redefined it

    Fearless, cuz stereotypes don’t faze me
    An Asian and a Jew makin Hip Hop so tasty
    Yes I have a tiger mom. Yes my blood is tiger balm
    I’m a class act and class is in session
    So grab a notepad cuz here’s a free lesson

    Brooklyn to the Bay from the East to the West
    Always on point cuz we strive to impress
    Rock the microphone when we put it to the test
    So you better use protection cuz you’re fuckin with the best